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Innis Herald 

Mar. 1990 
Volume 24 
Issue 5 


Conspiracy Is^ </> 


The Black Beast 

The Black Beast. 
Which do you % 


Which is being 
chosen for you? 

- to 

tev«. *"* itdfe. 

M y — - 

-■4liry And 

.lit*. MmJ exutKTio 
to existence In f 

•Bd oiw enien tls ineit 
ipufiloa. BeyiNul ihe po- 

rtKh Into a under jrouod ■ 
At) rwl thiagi «re u br 
JOB. Politic* 1> u) ma- 

The Innis Herald ii pi'bJslicd fTioi-U"!/ I'ty the Innii College Stuilcnt Society and is 
prtnied ii WcUcr Ccnipiry l,id. The opinioni cxprcsscJ herein arc 
atiributablc only to iheir auihor'i. Lcdqti to the editor should be aJdresicd to The 
Editor, The Innii Herald. Innh College. 2 Sussex Ave. Toronlo. Onl. M5S 1 J3. 

"Tlie policeman is not Ihejc to creale disorder, 
he is iherc lo preserve disorder." 
- Mayor Daley of Qiicago, 1968 

The Evils of 

Well, this Black Beast thing 
probably needs some explaining. 
Robert O'DriscoIl, in Nalo and 
the Warsaw Pact Are One refers 
to two Black Beasts: the Black 
Boast of the Apocalypse, of 
Christian lore, and the Black Beast 
thai comes out of a toe in Celtic 
Mythology. The latter is the 
defender of the human imagination 
and ideal. 

There is a war going on, and 
we arc participating in it every day. 
When wc watch TV. When we 
stand in line to gel numbers from 
Das Maschine (welfare lines, 
student I.D. lines, bank lines, etc. 
etc. etc.). When wc listen to 
music. When we vote (although 
this front is rapidly losing its 
significance). Tlie battle is between 
the forces of the Black Beast and 
the Black BeasL 

The Black Beast of the 
Apocalypse says: "Give me your 
freedom, your mind, your 
individuality and your power of 
mason and rebellion, and I will \iy 
10 stave off the end of Everything 
for a few more days, by which 
point ytxi will be loo mcompetcnt lo 
care." You can either live safe or 
sane. The Black Beast of the 
Apocalypse tells you to live safe. 

This tactic, a fear tactic, has 
turned us into a herd of cows. We 
arc the generation that will decide 
the fate of the human race, and wc 
can't even decide what brand of 
beer lo drink. What docs this 
mean? Ii means that we are slowly 
but surely being taken over. 

S.I.N, number. Student 
number. Driver's licence number. 
Telephone number. OHIP number. 
Take a number please. Number 
539. These ate the numbers of the 

Married With Children. 
MTV. The llogan Family. MTW. 
Three's Company. Wheel of 
Forturu. Teenage Mutant Ninja 
Turtles. These are the faces of the 

This is what the Beast does to 


- leaches you to choose the 
status quo over anything else; 

- leaches your children to be 
paranoid greedy xenophobes; 

- indoctrinates the world in the 
ways of lethargy, unthinking, 
apathy and hopelessness; 

- generates a terrible fear of 
Ihe future which paralyzes you and 
keeps you from acting in any 
mcoiingful and fulfilling way. 

These are the names of the 
Beast: the Moral Majority, the 
Conservative Party of Cfanada, the 
Liberal Pany of Canada, Pat Sajak, 
Ayatollah Jthomeini, Oral Roberts, 
Nlcolal Ceaucescu (who was 
Illiterate), Idl Amin, Margaret 
Thatcher, Oeorge Bush, The New 
Democrau, Dan Quayle (who 
doesn't deserve the American 
people as much as xttt Amerlca.n 
people deserve him), Mary Brown 
(former bead of the Ontario Censor 
Board), Rodney Dangerfleld, 

Oliver North. Joe Cummins 
(environmenlaJ fearmonger)... The 
list goes on indefinitely, and at 
some point, each and every one of 
us is on it. 

These are the characteristics of 
the Beast: bureaucracy, inaction, a 
glorification of static structures, a 
love of numbers, a compulsive 
desire to organize people, 
apocalyptic ideology, nihilism, 
greed, haut^, unconditional love. 

The Black Beast of the 
Apocalypse is winning. It is 

winning you and it is winning me. 
Here are a few examples lo 
demonstrate why this is so. 

For the price of a case of beer 
you can buy an acre of land in the 
Amazon and preserve it for future 
generations. Wc generally buy the 

Instead of that case of beer wc 
could sponsor a child so that he or 
she could eat. Wc choose to get 
drunk, because that is expedient. 
Sponsoring a child costs about $25 
a month. If you smoke a pack a 
day, you spend nvc times that in a 
month just for the pleasure and 
indulgence of destroying your 

Let's not whine. Most of us 
are not rich, A rich student is 
something that doesn't often exist 
and when one does, it is such a 
self-contradiction that the 
usclcssncss of excess money 
becomes glaringly apparent. But 
we all can afford lo do something 
like this. And if we, who, despite 
our relative poverty, arc some of 
Ihc richest people in the world, are 
unwilling to do something, then 
things will generally remain 

But the Beast is a very 
insidious presence. It docs not tell 
us not 10 do these things. Rather, it 
kills in us the imagination necessajy 
to conceive of a better world. It 
destroys though guilt and fear the 
hope and strength within each 
human being to follow his or her 

destiny to the end. One of its most 
secretive and all-pcrvasivc weapons 
is: convenience. 

A remote control means you 
never have to stand up. Seven- 
Eleven meatus that you never have 
to go far. News at Eleven, so you 
can be shovm the world without 
having to enter it News at Ten, if 
you can't wait for the News at 
Eleven. New. Improved. Faster, 
so you can have more time with 
your remote control. CDs never 
scratch and you don't have to do 
anything but press a button. 
Microwaves, so you don't have lo 
wait for the TV dinner you couldn't 
be bothered lo cook. Diet pills, so 
you can lose the TV dinners from 
the microwave while silting with 
your remote control watching the 
News at Ten. Welfare, so wc don'i 
have to care about the homeless that 
we see on the News at Ten while 
wc munch on our microwave 

The Black Beast of the Celts is 
a very difTcrcnt animal. This Beast 
is the sworn enemy of microwave 
popcorn and Police Academy 
films. This Beast is the champion 
of the human spirit, the 
imagination, the concept of the 
ideal, the desire to act, the need to 
change the worid. This Beast is in 
each one of us, as well. 

The Black Beast wants you to 
think. It hates Three's Company, 
it hates five-year plans. It hales 

govcmmcni subsidies, it loves 
charity when it's sincere. Accept 
the Celtic vision of the Black Beast 
and you will find yourself 
frequently disgusted with what you 
arc capable of doing and not doing, 
but things will begin lo happen, 
■you will begin to care. 

The reason ihai O'DriscoIl uses 
this mythology is so thai wc can be 
led into a more faniasuc world. A 
world of plastic and silicon is 
nothing lo be too cnihrallcd u,iih - 
a world where you arc consianily 
fighiing 10 retain your sums wiihin 
the human race is much more 
exciting and much more likely lo 
incite you to think, imagine, and 
care. 'The mythic world is a more 
accurate rcprcscniaiion of ihc real 
ihan any oihcr. because wiihin ii ihc 
things of imporuncc arc embodied 
and enlivened. 

Sartre said that thinking is only 
a prelude to aciion. In saying 
he shows his awareness of the fact 
dial human beings are in a world, 
and thai we have hands lo do things 
in and with the world. One may 
ihink for as long as one warns, bui 
until you have left your fingcrpnnis 
on the world, you arc nothing. 

It is the Black Bcasi or the 
Black Beast. There is a real 
struggle going on, real enough lo 
deserve Uw mythos thai will inspire 
humanity to cndiue and prevail. 

The Innis Herald 

March 1990, Volume 24, Issue 5 
The paper thai more people choose to line their birdcages wiih. 

Our Ever-Growing Editburo Elite 

Editor-In Chief-ln-Necd-Of-Rclic(^ Keidi Denning 

Assistant Editor In Charge of Rants Brigadier Blitz 

Poelry Editor With The Requisite Long Hair _...Braz 

Film Editor In Charge of Raves Steve Graveslock 

Environment Editor and Illuminator of Our Lives Chen 

Theatre Editor and Token Campbell Soup Kid Rick 

Gopher (doubles for other small funy animals) Daniel Hill 

Photographer On Loan From The Mike Jim DesRochcs 

(Sean Gregory is Honorary AssistanI Editor since he can 
undoubtedly do a belter job Ihan Mr. Blinli.) 

The Masses (Contributors) 

Anicles and SmIT: 

Kathy Humphre)'S, Richard Sdrling Robinson. Kare-T Sumner 
JefTTennant, Odin & Warren. Ch«i, Kcilh Denning. M)TlJe 
Auntie "M", Rick Campbell & Slo e Oravesiock 


John Andereon, Sean Gregory, Braz, Bliiz, Lucmia 
MishKa, Daniel Hill, Yukn KogUn, Imte Juorlink 
&Lorcn Davie 

T j^rr, mvi Ti^^ 

Lisa Muilwyk, William BeJI, ihc myneiv TA, Sirgy Wster 
& Auntie 'M" and the SFFfrufsVETAE 

Thii piper Ii oonpbad)' biakfTtiMc. Bu: then, nu^ rvcr)iJiirj la lS< 
lUnT I me«n. one food-cixed vUl o/ hj-drpchtoric »od a-itl fti rid of pontic*!]* 
tcy^hing yoo want b dme. dcmp n m f ftcycUej Sox whwi v«: rr 

the Inalf Heratd hat an open letter 
policy. AU Icucn muit be signed ami 
mutt be free of nasi, agift, itcnophobtc, 
teuii, homophobic ind/or icnnintUy 
iiupid comcni. Opiniont expnited in 
Icuen, ai in aU lubtniiiioni to ihe 
Herald, arc aUribulable only to the 
authon. No liibiliiy can be astutncd by 
the Innlf Herald, the Innli CoHege 
Student Society or the publisher. Go put 
that in your pipe and smofce it 

How to edit 
the Herald 

To the editor 

Let me jusi say, at the risk of 
sounding like an mircasonablc biich 
(which I am) that it is news to mc 
thai It is against Herald policy to 
respond to articles in the same issue 
in which they arc published. (You 
knew I was going to write, didn't 
you Bliu?) It seems to me, that in 
the October 1989 issue of the 
Herald, that Jim Shcddcn was 
allowed to read my article on the 
status of the pub and respond to It 
in the same issue as il was 
primed. Hmmm. Has the 
editorial policy changed since 
October? Did Blitz (and Shcddcn, 
who I'm positive is old enough to 
know belter) fuck up, leaving it to 
Denning, in a fit of responsibility, 
to assert this policy in connection 
with the "Nattering Nabobs" 
article? Or, is It just that nobody 
knows what the fuck the editorial 
policy of the Herald Is? Or, is it 
just that nobody in the whole 
organization knows what the fuck 
is going on? 

Several things lead mc to 
conclude the latter. 

Having gotten that off my 
chest, let mc offer some advic^r 
observations regarding the policies 
of the Herald: 

Re: articles about ICSS 
activities. Since the policy of the 
less is that anybody belonging to 
the college can go to a meeting and 
find out what's going on, and vote 
even, I don'i think you should 
worry too much about them not 
submitting articles. If anyone 
wants to know what's going on 
(alas, most don't) ihcy can go to a 
meeting, or stop by tlic ofTice. Not 
to worry. 

Re: sports, college 
happenings, etc. Since the paper 
only comes out once a month 
(speaking in very, loose terms) I 
don't think this type of reporting, 
i.e. news reporting is that vital. 
All the news would be loo old. 
Imagine if I had submitted sports 
scores on the January I5th deadline 
for the last Herald, which I didn't 
acquire until Feb. 5. The scores 
would have been three weeks old 
before anyone read them. Who 

Rc: poetry. I understand that 
somebody (the editors or whoever - 
- do we have a publisher in the 
strict sense?) had decided that the 
Herald Is a forum for student 
opinion rather than a newspaper. 
This Is cool. However. I'm a little 
concerned about the inclusion of 
poetry, doesn't this kind of 
undermine the role of SCAT! 
within the college? Using the 
Herald as a forum for opinions 
regarding day to day life In the 
university is fine. Using it as a 
forum for poetry is stretching its 
boundaries In nich a manner that it 
threatens the college's literary 

Re: your problems getting 
nibmlsilons. Maybe if you had. 
like, meeilnts, and maybe if you. 
like, poitea more signs about 
deadline*, you would get more 
njbmlssions. Ai yon pointed out 
in your last Issue, only about five 
people (your number) read the 
Herald, it this is the case, what is 
Ihe point of all the Utile Irnioendos 
contained In the laxt issue urging 

A low blow 
to Mo 

Dear Shmo of the Land of Sappy: 

La prima cosa ncssuno di noi 
non cs Italiano. 

Having said that, I'd like to 
point out our only problem with 
writing this letter: you are probably 
the type who really gels off on 
gctdng annoyed feedback. 

My parents did indeed discover 
my dark secret. I can scarcely 
bring myself to recall the look in 
their faces as Ihcy uncovered my 
dual life as a smoker. I'm snot sure 
how they did il -- I'm sure I didn't 
tell them. Maybe I shouldn't have 
asked dad for the light... 
incidentally, I suppose it's this 
costly addiction or ours which 
prevents us from updating our 
faded pants collection. How's that 
for pnorilics? Chacun son gout 
(and no we're not French either). 

On to other mailers. I would 
have to guess when one spends his 
time, as you seem to do. making 
his own pathetic situation worse, 
by bcliltlin| it, and lying to himself 
about the situations of others, card 
playing probably seems a little 
wasteful. Of course I've never 
given your hobby a go. so I can't 
really say for sure. 

We the arlfag. headache- 
stricken, birthmarked, pseudo- 
Italian, poorly-yct-cipcnslvcly 
dressed, usaless patrons of ihe 
cards have not taken offense to 
your Idler; we just forgot our cards 
at home, so we thought we'd wrlie 
you to gel our minds off this music. 

While writing wc think we 
may have stumbled across your 
problem, here at Innis we do some 
crazy things: wc treat people fairly, 
and accord our trust and affection 
on the basis of personalities, 
values, morals, etc. Call us crazy 
but we don't judge people 
according to race, religion, jacket 
cost, and so on. 

We think wc may also have 
some solutions to your problem: 

1 . slan playing cards lo ease 
this pcssimlsilic paranoia of yours; 

2. sit somewhere upwind, so 
your delicate olfactories won't be 
bolhcicd by lingering cologne; 

3. go home and stay there; 

4. don't hang around Inni.s; 

5. Slan a career in small lime 
real estate, the reiums arc 
favourable and you can set your 
own hours. 

Correction, we were offended 
by your racist remarks {xnjx in the 
article). None of us is actually 
Italian (not that there's anything 
wrong with being Italian, and I'm 
not jusi saying that because I like 
the food), we are actually incredibly 

diverse in our ethnic backgrounds. 
Kind of a cuchre-playing-global- 
smorgasbord. The idea ihat 
ethnicity has some kind of bearing 
on character is obtuse, small, 
marrow-minded, demeaning, 
disappointing, wrong, bullshit, 
offensive, and proof lhat evolution 
doesn't work as well for some 
people (by which 1 mean you), and 
just plain fucked-up. 
So don't do it. 

Anyway Shmo, that's where 
wc stand on the assholes at Innis 
issue. Remember: never, ever play 
the right bower on lop of your 
partner's o(f-suil ace. if the person 
next 10 you has the nine, and you 
haven't any other trump, and you 
need the next three tricks. 


Auntie "M" and the 
the Furtherance of Intcr-partncr 
Hannony and the Advancemcni of 
Third World Euchre Toumamcnis 
and die Hindrance of Assholes on 

A V- A ^^^-VW 

> V \ % \ '4 % ' 

" % -r H- \ \\ '.■ % 


Dearest Herald of Innis: 

Is il possible to get a 
subscription to your newspaper? It 
makes me very embarrassed to 
walk into Innis College to pick one 
up and feel like people arc laughing 
at my funny haircut. 

I don't go 10 university but I'm 
a great fan of your paper and hope I 
merit a position on your staff some 

Would that mean I would have 
to belong to your college? Yealt. 1 
guess so. Oh well. Is il true llial 
innis College only offers 'Mickey 
Mouse' courses? Thai's what my 
mom says. Please help mc. Thank 

Siggy Wistcr 

Dear Siggy: 

Your mom's wrnnn, and 
you'll have to slop listening to 
her if you ever hope lo join our 
diminished but undaunted staff. 
Herald editors and staff are 
sworn never to listen to their 
moms. Arul his of u.s have funny 
hair. Once, I saw one of the 
editors and I laughed for a wcvk. 

El Editor Supremo 

P.S. I can hand deliver you a 
copy when il comes out for a 
nominal fee of, oh. Id's .lay ihe 
CO.SI of my rent. 

A Hair-raising error 

Dear editor: 

rc: the review in tlic Jan/Fcb 
Herald of The Sensual World 
(Kate Bush) by Tombstone. 

Let mc start off by saying 
Mmm... yes." I do agree widi 
amost everything Tombstone had lo 
say in his review and was most 
impressed with his obvious 
familiarity with Kate's older work. 
His is easily Ihe must 
knowledgeable Kale Bush review 
I've ever read In any campus paper. 

Bui - Kale CUTTING her 
hair exiremely short?! Never! That 
would be sacrcligious! I think lhat 
on the cover of The Sensual 
World Kate must have had her hair 
lightly pulled back, for it is as long 
and flowing as ever in the videos 
for "Love and Change" and "TTic 
Sensual World". 

Anyways, good review. 

-William Bell, VIC II 

people to write? You'll only get 
five articles. Try publicity 
throughout the college, h will 
probably reach more people, but 
I'm warning you, they won't all 
like the Dead. 

You crni '.ike my suggestions, 
or leave them. But what I think 
you guys need is a good right-wing 
success-hungry publicist. Come 
on, sacrifice y«ii belief in ihe style 
of the paper for niccess. 

- Lisa Muilwyk 

The editor replies, if 
somtwhal lenlalivety: I would 
first like 10 point out that letters, 

as per news service tradition, 
are frequently replied to, and 
thai this doesn't break Herald 
policy. Speaking of Herald 
policy, that ot\e bit of policy to 
which you referred came about 
because of the Pub Article 
Controversy cf which you were a 
centrepiece. You should be 
proiui to be an instrument of 
social change at the college and 
perhaps the universe at large. 

The less used to write 
many articles in the past. Those 
of us who had classes or were 
writing essays or were (heaven 
forbid) working at Ihe times that 

Ihe less had meetings could 
know what was being decided 
without us. They don't now. 
People don't care about things 
they don't know about. If they 
don't know what was passed at 
Ihe latest ICSS meeting, they 
sure as hell won't care. There is 
at least a slight chance that they 
would care if they could read 
about it. 

I don't really care much 
about sports, but they consilute 
a large part of many Innis 
students' lives. They should be 

And yes, if you've noticed, 

there are posters all over the 
college n/7w. Actually, this time 
around, we already have piles of 

I don't think that we could 
put SCAT.' into any greater 
danger than they've managed lo 
put themselves in. SCAT!, in Ihe 
first year I was here, was a force 
to be reckoned with. They have 
some sock-pulling to do now, I 

And finally, the editor is far 
less Interested in whether our 
writers like Ihe Grateful Dead 
than he is about whether ihey 
like Schoenberg and Penderecki. 


To ihc editor: 

Rc: Your editorial, Innis 
Herald. JanVFcb. 1990. 

While I agree with most of 
your concerns regarding the 
"policing" or student publications 
as it has been proposed at U of T, I 
would lalce issue with your 
characterization of the problem of 
oversized classrooms. You suggest 
that the inconveniences that 
undergrads face, deriving from 
certain limits placed upon class 
size, are the products of "some of 
the professors [whol don't want to 
teach any more of us than they have 
to." You then celebrate two 
professors who found, instead of 
twenty students, about seventy 
students on the Hrsl day of class, 
and you write; "Now, being very 
together professors whose love of 
teaching far outweighed any anal 
retentive sense of tenured 
righteousness, they both 
accomodated the surprising interest 
that the student body showed in the 
subject material." Professors who 
arc not "together," and who insist 
upon a feasabic pcdogical 
atmosphere (where students are 
asked to do a bit more Uian act as 
ihcy do on any given night at Ihc 
Cineplex-Odcon), arc held 
responsible for some students' 
inability lo get into a class. You 
then take a crack at "catatonic" 
lecturers (and TAs, I presume) 
without any awareness that such 
instructors arc largely overworked 
and underpaid on account of 
oversized classes. Talk to the 
CUEW local 2 or the Faculty 
Association if you wish to know a 
bit more about the Issues you 
approach here. Otherwise, you arc 
ycl again one victim blaming other 
victims while the real culprits don't 
gel the criticism they deserve. 
Furthermore, while you bemoan 
limitations on class size and 
instructors' attempts to remedy this 
situation, you also corrmlain that the 
university is a "wcll-oifcd machine" 
which is "spilling out numbers in 
amounts so large that ihey have to 
be useless." Well, you can't have 
your cake.... 

I wouldn't worry too much 
about die administration censoring 
your paper, since, unwittingly, you 
arc fighting some of its own tatties. 


A concerned TA 

Dear mystery TA: 

Thai was a TKO if ever I 
was al Ihe receiving end of one. 
I must admit that on reading it 
in print I was very disappointed 
in my editorial for many of the 
same reasons that you pointed 
out to me. You must appreciate 
that one in a position of such 
great power lends lo gel a little 
bombastic. I think thai we would 
both agree on who the real 
culprit Is. 

However, Ihe university is 
not here lo employ professors; it 
is here to educate students. In 
thai light, the steps that the 
university took to make life 
more bearable for the staff (and 
to keep its machinery well-oiled) 
were manifestly wrong, for those 
steps did and do make it very 
difficullfor a large number of the 
students thai attend here. 

I appreciate that many 
lecturers and TAs are 
overworked and underpaid, and 
that this lowers the enthusiasm 
of students: however, this 
problem is not to he solved by 
making it nigh impassible for 
any one student to complete a 
four-year degree here in four 
years. There arc a few 
professors here who, according 
to a great many students, 
deserve Ihc boot I hope that I 
do not offend the majority, who 
do excellent work, by stating Ihe 

The culprits, as we arc all 
well aware, are underfunding 
and administrative waste. One 
example is SAC, which, Judging 
by the number of press releases I 
have received from them in Ihe 
past month (about twenty), 
spends most of its sizable budget 
on mailing letters, too many of 
which read something like: 
"Charles Olaltberg said. This 
soup is delicious. Could you 
please pass the crackers.'" 

Thank you for your concern. 
The editor 

Don't forget the Annual 
Innis Family Brunch 

Sunday, April 22, 1990 


Innis College Pub 

RSVP: Audrey Perry: 978-4332 

or JimShedden: 978-7790. 

More on Hummel 

Dear Innis Herald: 

n: "In Defense of Hummel" 
(Herald. Jan/Feb 1990). 

Huirunel is a pcrvien. Anyone 
who finds out girls' swimming 
schedules just to stare at their half- 
naked bodies is dcrinitely sick. 
Anyone who defends Hummel 
obviously doesn't know what it is 
like to be stared at, followed or 
harassed in any way by an icky 






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JefT Ttnnanl 

Amnesty Internalional, 
Group 83 

Over Ihc past S(« momhs Uic 
world has seen a numcr of raihcr 
high and thick walls come toppling 
to the sround. The Berlin Wall. 
The prison wall surrounding 
Nelson MamJcIa. And the prison 
wall sunounding the five Romanian 
prisoners for whom our Amnesty 
International group on campus 
(Group 83) has recently been 
writing appeals. 

Yet despite such promising 
dcvclopmcnis, many walls remain 
standing and Ihc human rights 
situation around the world as we 
enter the 90's is still far from being 
a cause for jubllalion. In 
Guatemala and El Salvador, 
government-backed death squads 
continue to abduct, torture end 
brutally murder people perceived to 
be opponents. In Easl Timor, 
occupying Indonesian forces 
continue to perpetrate abuses that 
you will rarely read about in the 
press. In Yugoslavia, A/cm Vllasi, 
a prominent political leader in 
Kosovo province, may face the 
death penalty for "counter- 
revolutionary under-mining of the 
socialist order". And in the Uniic<l 
.States of America, over 2(H)0 
prisoners wait on death row lo he 
h,uigod, shot, gassed, electrocuted, 
or "humanely" killed by lethal 
injection. In the face of such 
gnvemmenl brutality, the world's 
most respected human rights 
watchdog, Amnesty International, 
acts according to the Chinese 
proverb: "Bcllcr to tight a candle 
than 10 curse the darkness". 

Amnesty International (A.I.) 
was founded in 1961 in Britain, 
and since the beginning based its 
work on Ihc belief that every 
person has the right lo hold and to 
express his or her convictions, aitd 
has an obligation lo extend the same 
freedoms lo others. It is now a 
world-wide human rights 
movement which is independent of 
any government, political grouping, 
ideology, economic interest of 
religious creed. 

Activities of A.I. adhere to a 
precise thrcc-poinl mandate which 
focu.sscs on prisoners: 

1. It seeks the release of men 
and women detained anywhere for 
their beliefs, colour, sex, ethnic 
origin, language, or religion, 
provided they have not used or 
advocated violence. These people 
arc termed "prisoners of 

2. It advocates fair and prompt 
trials for all political prisoners and 
works on behalf of such persons 
detained without charge or without 

3. It opposes without 
reservation the death penalty and 
torture, or otJicr cruel, inhuman or 
degrading punishment of all 

Group 83 in one of about 
riflccn A.I. groups in the Toronto 
area. It is run entirely by U. of T. 
students and is financed Itirough 
our own fundraising efforts. We 
have an office on the downtown 
campus and are also active on the 

Erindalc campus. 

Our group organizes many 
events on campus, from lectures 
and film nights to vigils and petition 
campaigns. We participate in the 
annual Amnesty International Week 
in mid-October, selected country 
campaigns, the Urgent Action 
Network, Religion Action 
networks (Eastern Europe and the 
Middle Easl), refugee work and 
much more. 

One of the important 
aspects of any A.I. group's 
commitment is work on prisoner 
dossiers assigned by Amnesty's 
research department in Britian. In 
the past we've worked on prisoner 
adoption cases from the Soviet 
Union, Pcni and Nicaragua, as well 
as an investigation case concerning 
aprosoncr in SouUi Africa. All of 
these prisoners have since been 
released. We are currently working 
to obtain the release of a 
conscientious objector to military 
service Improsoned in Greece, and 
Greek officials have recently begun 
to acknowledge receipt of our 
letters of appeal. 

If you want to join our group 
or obtain more information about 
Amnesty Inlernalional please 
contact our office in Innis Room 
210. If there is nobody in Ihc 
office, notices of events will be 
posted on Ihc bulletin board beside 
our door. Our answering machine 
also provides up-to-date 
announcements of upcoming 
meetings and events. Our number 
is: 978-7434. 

And don't forget Ihc Waiters 
concert on March 16. All the 
proceeds go to a worthy cause: 
Amnesty International. 

The Innis Writing Lab 

offers Innis students free help 
with any written work 
assigned for any course. 
(Other students can come lo us with 
work assigned for JGI- or INI- courses.) 

For more information 
drop by Room 314. 
For an appointment 
drop by or phone 978-4871. 

Men., Wed., Fri. 9-5 
Tue. 9-1, Thurs. 1-5 

Deadline for 
the April 
edition of the 

IIimiBS^ lEIcimllcfl 

March 23rd. 


J? n^iisancC O^angCecC ^aBy T>ucl<^ Symphony 

Sieve Gravestock 

Horror movies arc generally 
prcity dismal. The genre has 
aiiracicd some pools of varying 
quality (Dreycr and Mumau Tor 
example) bul ihcir intcrcsi in the 
form itself was usually prcily 
minimal. They tended to use ii once 
-- mainly because it suited a 
particular idea they wanted to 
explore -- and then abandon it 
forever. Artists who've matured 
while working in the genre (like Dc 
Palma and Stuan Goidon) normally 
approached it irottically and used it 
to express an absunlist sensibility. 
However, the works these anists 
produced seldom seem like "real' 
horror movies because there's an 
implicit distance from the form in 

Every once in a while, a 
competent craftsman docs a decent 
job (sec Wise's Tht Haunting) 
and, even more infrequently, the 
form provides technically 
proficient, undisciplined bores with 
enough discipline to make 
something acceptable. (Ridley 
Scolt's only good film is Alitn). 
For those people truly drawn to the 
form (like Tobc Hooper , Wcs 
Craven or Herk Harvey), making 
horror movies serves as some kind 
of bizarre psychoanalysis. Their 
work is interesting sociologically 
and psychologically, or because of 
its influence on more significant 
figures, but not normally for its 
own anistic merits. The genre 
continues to draw viewers bKausc 
it plays on primal emotions. (In 
other words, because il can 
sometimes be dumb, lurid fun.) 
However, horror movies seldom 
reach even that level and the 
audience usually leaves feeling 
cheated. Like musicals, horror 

movies as a genre almost always 
promise more than they can deliver. 
The audience keeps coming back 
because of that promise. 

The genre tends to draw hacks 
and charlatans. Hacks are 
preferable here - as elsewhere -- 
because sometimes thcyll stumble 
on something in spite of 
ihansclvcs. Charlatans are infinitely 
worse because, in ihcir hurry to 
impress (read con) their audiences 
with their big dumb ideas, they 
justify whatever big dumb ideas 
their audiences have and encourage 
them to continue thinking in the 
same vein. They inadvertently 
prove everything prudes and bad 
high-school teachers claim about 
pop forms (while they're killing off 
any interest or enthusiasm you 
might develop in ait by telling you 
how good il is for you). 

As a genre, fantasy movies are 
even more contemptible. They're 
almosi the exclusive province of 
charlatans and ihey offer less 
emotionally than horror movies. 
Worse, the big dumb ideas in 
fantasy films arc bigger and 
dumber. (See anything with George 
Lucas' name on il for piDof, except 

Kershncr's The Empire Strikes 
Back. Keishner's a real director.) 

The novelisi-tumod-filmmaker 
Clivc Barker is an exemplary 
charlatan. He fakes it in both 

Barker is the kind of figure (I 
refuse to use the word artist) who 
impiiascs adolescents headed for a 
lifclime membership (actually or 
spiritually) in the Aryan Aimy. As 
an author he's impossible to read. 
Like Stephen King (one of his 
biggest fans), he vnitcs mind- 
numbingly ugly and repetitive 
prose, jam-packed with topical 
idiocies presented as profound 

thoughts. Only a couple of things 
separate them. Barker makes more 
use of his thesaurus — I'm sure 
lambent is one of his favourite 
words — and has a fashionable 
bohcmian interest in extreme forms 
of behaviour. He's also read a liulc 
Jung or, more likely, it's nitered 
thioogh to him. 

As a filmmaker. Barker is only 
slightly more bearable and that's 
only because film forces him to 
move faster. Uellraiser, his first 
movie, is beloved by people who 
consider Ken Russell a genius. 
Barker was cagey enough to devote 
a lot of attention to the 'visuals' 
(something bohemians and 
adolescent dorks arc easily 
impressed by) and to give it a 
fashionable whiff of hell (wltich 
also impressed the shit out of the 
same people). Susan Sontag once 
remarked that ihe true fashionable 
hidden passion of the late twentieth 
century wasn't homosexuality, it 
was sadomasochism. Barker - with 
his astonishing ability to sell this 
slulT as evidence of his profundity 
and daring ~ makes you think she 
was right. Barker's villains 
charged out of their dimension 
dressed to the nines in S & M 
regalia while droning on about the 
exquisite pleasure in feeling 
excniciating pain. The film was 
crammed with lengthy, graphic 
torture scenes featuring his two 
specialties: hooks plunging into 
human Ilesh and skin being ripped 

Barker differs from other 
anists who use aberrant bcliaviour 
(like Lynch who's iruly horrified by 
il or Almodovar who uses il meta- 
phorically) because he uses it to in 
order to moralize over it and to 
impress his audience. A true 
charlatan. Barker has a medieval 
monk's values and Cecil B. de 

Millc's commercial instincts. He 
openly condemns what he shows 
and then produces it as evidence of 
how intense and feverish his 
imagination is. 

Like his soulmalc — David 
Cronenberg - Barker operates on 
an extremely right wing agenda. 
Sex is bad (the heroines m Barker's 
movies are curiously sexless); 
humans are disgusting and bodies 
arc vile. 

The proto-fascist elements in 
Barker's sensibility are especially 
evident in his latest: Nighi Breed. 
Craig Sheffcr stars as Boone who's 
troubled by bad dreams. It turns 
out that Boone is acnially Night 
Breed, a member of the tribes of ihc 
moon. They were almost totally 
killed off by Christianity and now 
science —embodied by Boone's evil 
psychiatrist played, conveniently 
enough for me, by David 
Cronenberg - wants to do the 
same. This is horrible and 
derivative 60's drivel, a mix of 
Herbert, Heinlen and God knows 
what else. Ii's proto-fascist 
because il's evident, as soon as we 
get an extended look at the super- 
powered moon-nibe members, that 
they are superior to us lowly 
humans who can'l appreciate their 
beauty and mystery. Sounds a bit 
like Mein Kampf, eh? 

The film is incredibly 
incompetently done. Barker never 
even attempts to establish an 
atmosphere and relies on cheap 
pyrotechnics - like swish pans - 
and blatantly derivative, run-of-the- 
mill special effects, and a pounding 
score to sustain viewer interest and 
create suspense. Barker's so 
saiisflcd that his deep ideas will sell 
the film that he can't even be 
bothered to pay attention to how a 
scene plays. When Boone gets 

angry at his doctor, he slams a 
cassette recorder down on his dcdc. 
We wait for a loud bang but it's 
about as loud as a pin dropping. 
It's like hearing Barker's mind at 

If you're interested in seeing 
an cracrtaining horror film 1 heartily 
recommend any of Stuan Gordon's 
films {Re-animator , From 
Beyond and Dolls, which boasts 
one of the bcsi ad lines in the 
history of movies: They walk, they 
talk, ...they kill!). If you've 
already seen those I also 
recommend Roway Hcmngion s 
Jack's Back, with James Spader. 
Hcrrington establishes a nice creepy 
tone from the very beginning and 
there's a great, eerie (though cheap) 
plot twist set right in the middle of 
the film. (There are also a number 
of witty vistml jokes.) 

The film is stocked with 
distinctive and talented performers 
(like Robert Rcardo and Cynthia 
Gibb) and Hcrrington knows how 
to use them effectively. He's 
particularly good with Spader. 
Although Spader is rather limited as 
an actor (though not nearly as 
limited as someone like Tom 
Cruise), he has a tense, vaguely 
threatening quality onscreen. 
Hcrrington plays on this 
Spader's most interesting aspect - 
effectively by using him as a 
suspea in a scries of murders. Best 
of all, Hcrrington has the brains to 
use the great Chris Mulkey, who's 
a low-budget version of Dennis 
Quaid, as comic relief. The film 
isn't particularly iniclligcni and it' s 
nothing major. However, it never 
insults the audience, has no big 
dumb ideas and is competently 
made, and that puts it iigh> )-cars 
ahead of Barker's work. 

A Little Revenge Goes a Long Way 

Karen Sumner 

Tony Scott may not have 
learned a lot In the years since Top 
Gun but he has learned how to 
shoot airplanes. In hii new film, 
Revenge, Ihc long shots of the jet 
scooting over some very suneal 
Mexican landscape offer an cxcliing 
opening to what haji been promoted 
as a very exciting film. 
Unfortunaicly, all of Ihc fast-paced, 
violent, stirring revenge in 
Revenge is given to us in the 
trailer of Ihe film -- wlint you sec 
bcfiitc you go is what you gel. The 
rcM of llic film (and there's lots nf it 
uMT Iwo hniifi) is niiiiiily :i love 
^iiiry, with 11 lew nioii.u nip 
inntiu-nl'; llinnvii in in kt-cp iis 
nailinc l'':il ilainn revcncf plni. 

Ki'viii Ciisuier plays a jel-pliuie 
pilot who'.s bored of his job (hull?) 
dcspile all appenronces to the 
conirory, and who quits his career 
allogcUier In order lo mellow out for 
awhile. Scolt spends Ihe first 
twenty mlnulej of the film trying lo 
convince the audience of this 

premise, while we wonder why 
Casmer just doesn't lake a leave of 
absence. But never mind -- il's 
done " and we'll Just have to bear 
with il and the ieary drawn-out 
farewell with his room-mate, who 
he'll see In a few weeks when he 
gets back. He heads off lo Meh- 
hee-co In his jeep with his dog 
Rocky lo slay with his old friend 
and Mafioso Padre Tiby (Anihony 
Quin-i), whose life Costncr has 
saved on some previous occasion 
so thai they are, of course, ilie 
closest of close. There's lots of 
Joking and backslapping when he 
arrives, hui we sec no rciil wiirinih 
Ik-Iwccm the Iwo. until of coursi- 
f 'iiMiier s[K)is Ihc liuly of Ihc Imusc 
(N'.icli'llni' Siowc). iiml then things 
rciilly Ileal up Cosincr and Sliiwc 
have ilicir requisite, prc.C'oniraclcd 
Hoi & Steamy sex scenes, things 
get ugly when the big guy finds 
out, laitl then die story takes off as 
Coslner begins lo lake ihe title 

The film Is often hokey. 
tedious or downright lame (or all 

\iaee), but the performances are not 
bad and there are some truly 
entertaining sequences. Costncr is 
his usual wooden self, but that's 
never really been a problem for him 
(or for me). His llal, monotoned 
voice and his physical movements 
seem so untrained and 
unprofessional that he's cither a 
genius or a real hack — It doesn't 
really matter which. I have a 
suspicion that he is incapable of 
acting outside of the luurow range 
of characters he's played (they're all 
pretty similar, some more .sarcastic 
lhan Ihc others). Or mayhe he 
docsn l act at all, hut merely s|iciiV.s 
his part und w.nllcs through it .ts 
casuully as a walk through llic ivtrk 
Whatever Ihc cose, his liiik nl 
polish (or skill) works for hini, so 
that he Is always a little off-ccntrc 
and rough around the edges, Just 
what a l^lng babe should be. 

Casting Anihony Quinn as Ihc 
bad guy Is a good piece of ry/Mte. 
Hc'i got I hulking, droopy quality 
like John Huston, only he's beefier, 
the way a Mexican mob boss 

should be. He looks like a man of 
power, even at his more sofily 
ii^ulgcnt manwnis. The draw-hack 
of Ihe character - not the actor - is 
his predlaabillly. That he turns out 
10 be a nasty piece of work is oh so 
yawnfully expected, and none of 
his hideous deeds shock us. Quinn 
has a nice light touch though and 
looks prelty good in a SpcoJo for 
an old guy. Despite my reaction, wc 
arc .surely meant to be somewhat 
repulsed by his manlagc to his 
young and hcauliful wife, hut 
Slowc leaves no imiircssion in ilic 
film. It's not about her, it's ahoul 
what evil things cm he ilniic ti> her 
and uli;u heroic ihinjis e-iil Ik- dniic 
/(ir her .She. alas, cant do 
iiiiylhing hut f:ill in love ami then 
leaci lo Ihc men ol action aioiiiul 
her. It would have tvcn iiitcrotinp 
had Scott allowed Slowc to take 
some part In the whole revenge 
process. Instejid. her pa.tslvlty .ind 
crtiel treaitnent act as the usual 
catalyst to gel the men angry and the 
plot moving. Having done this, she 
limply expires on cue. Just hi time 

to breathe 'I love you' to her 

The film is not all bad. There is 
a nice sequence when Cojiner and 
Slowe first make love, it is at a 
huge, glamorous political party for 
Quinn, where Siowe acddcn'jily 
(in a terribly orchestrated mo>'cmcni 
by Scott) meets up with the hunky 
pilot In a cloak-room. While they 
passionately bul poetically get it on. 
Quinn dances a parody of their tryst 
in front of a clapping, laughing 
crowd. As he comically prances 
ahoul renxiving articles of clothing 
and hamming it up with one of the 
fcnttlc guesis. the lovers are doing 
their slow. motion version of it just 
feci aivav 1)1 course. Qiiinn looks 
like he's h.tsing more fun ... 

.\ last comment on Revenj^e: 
The whole thing -- almost c>cry 
single scene - seems to have been 
shot at sun-do»n This gives the 
film i beautiful, haiy golden look, 
bul It becomcj ■ hit monotonous 
after tk-hile. It lore mikes Mexico 
and all who inhabit her look 
gorgeous, but »hy7 It geu i Nt 
comical . 

mw aim tliB Warsaw Pact are one 
- Armageddon Is Here To Stay 

KeUh Denning 

In mid-November, Professor 
Robert O'Driscoll spend the 
belter pari of a weeJt in a 
creative frenzy. The result, Nato 
and the Warsaw Pact Arc One, 
was launched by O'Driscoll and 
his Committee of Thirteen 
(composed of his students) at the 
Kiva Arts Gallery on McCaul 
Street on Febraury eleventh. To 
a highly entertained audience of 
about one hundred, O'Driscoll 
read excerpts from his 'action 
poem', demonstrating thai the 
emphasis was on the 'action'. In 
keeping with the atmosphere of 
the evening, free Polish vodka 
was served. The press was out 
in force; many university papers 
were there, as welt as the local 
media. The Godess of the 
Ogglebox herself. Erica Ehm, was 
rumoured to be attending, but 
was nowhere to be found, which, 
of course, spoiled this reporter's 
mood for the next four days. 

Professor O'Driscoll was 
interviewed by mc the following 
day. The following is a 
reconstruction of the very 
complex and intricate three-hour 

Keith Denning: What led you to 
write the poem? 

Robert O'Driscoll: Let mc sec... I 
could approach this in a number of 
ways. Tlic actual poem iuclf came 
out In about sin days October, 
last November. It was something a 
student said to me in the ordcc; md 
I just went home and 1 started 
writing, and it jusi seemed as if ihc 
whole tiling flooded through. And 
il didn't cliange too much, I mean, 
there were some refinements, and it 
coincided with the cruda! moment 
of changes in Eastern Europe. It 
wa.s like I was picking up some son 
of signal of something, but it was 
like also what that student said 
triggered something within my 
being and the whole dam came 
loose. As I say, most of the events 
that have affected the psychic tissue 
of my generation are in there in a 
fragmented or inchoate way, 
sometimes more sustained. 

Enthusiasm. I think 
cniliusiasm means in the dictionary 
when a god descended in the 
ancient classical world into a being 
and affected his approach to things. 
Now, bits and pieces, lines have 
been going through my head for 
three years, because I was very 
involved In the creation of a Celtic 
movement in Toronto; and in 1986, 
everything went wrong. 
Yes, that's in the appendix (to 
the poem). 

Right. Davis went out of power 
shortly before, William Davis, who 
supplied the resources for a lot of 
the stuff during the seventies. John 

Kelly was removed from Saint 
Michael's College ~ you know, I 
never did anything without 
checking with Kelly, you see. 1 
wouldn't him directly, but I'd 
show him. And ZcnaChciry in the 
CM would always make sure that 
the events that I had here reached a 
wider TO audience. So , it 

happened so quickly, and so 
uncaicgorically, thai I began 
searching for an explanation. Bits 
and pieces of the poem fontned in an 
attempt to reach towards some son 
of explanation for the catastrophic 
son of setback... 

...that led to your being removed 
as Director of the Celtic Studies 

That's right. The reason I was 
removed as Director of the program 
was that letter to Soibara [Gregoty 
Sorbara, who in 1986 was Minister 
of Colleges and Universities. The 
letter, and all letters mentioned in 
this interview, arc reprinted in the 
appendix to NATO and the 
Warsaw Pact Are One\. 1 had 
raised a million-and-a-half [for the 
Celtic Studies program] and 
Sorbara had announced this fifty 
million [Ontario university 
Execcllcncc Fund!. 1 wrote off to 
Sorbara, with John Kelly's 
knowledge. I showed it to him. 

Now, I don't know If the eye 
of NATO was here at U of T was 
here or not, but in tcrnis of the 
mythos of the poem, il was an 
individual seeking money for an 
academic program, following 
procedures which he had used 
before and coming up against some 
sort of blank wall and irrational 
denial: and the fact that President 
Connell made those statements in 
the letters that didn't jive with the 
Minister's added all sorts to my -■ 
not paranoia - but my feeling... I 
had a feeling of Don Quixote or 
something. So poetry, I think, is 
an attempt to seek an explanation 
for what is unexplainabic in 
ordinary terms, and the imagination 
and the Intuition leap towards .some 
son of explanation. I feci, I musi 
say, as If 1 cleared an awful lot out 
of my system with It. (Chuckles) 
An enema of the soul, so to speak. 
Bui il docs raise questions about 
internal matters within U of T. I 
mean, John Kelly's removal in '86 
Is sllll unexplained. What I have hi 
the poem there is what was actually 
told 10 mc. Did you sec tliai pan on 
ihc MIS? I suggest (of course in a 
poem you can only suggest but 
there's no denying the literal truth 
of a poem too) ihat there are forces 
beyond the University... what is 
called tnicmationally the Otey Men. 
[The Grey Men are a secret 
organization of Tivc families, the 
head of which is presently in 
Canadu They have existed and 
prospered by financing both sides 
of virtually every war for thcpast 
three hundred years. Tticy 
presently control both the United 
States and the Soviet Union, and 

arc moving towards the acaiion of 
a world state.) 
Do the Grey Men exat? 
Oh they do. I have a good bit of 
documentation on them in the form 
of books and things like that. 
Again, it's a figure where you can 
say "Oh God, it's paranoia" or 
something, but there's a good deal 
of documentation done by iwo 
students who were working on this 
Windwards magazine. The books 
of Lindsay Gordon, also.' 1 don't 
know how strong of an explanation 
that is, but I feci very strongly 
myself, just based on my own 
experience, that decisions are 
sometimes taken in our individual 
lives by forces which are beyond 
the sphere of our individual lives. 
Yes, the Grey Men exist, based on 
the readings I've done in 
Windwards, based on the books 
of Lindsay Gordon, based on the 
bits we know about the Federal 
Reserve, bated on Peter Bcrrcsford 
Ellis' book The Judas Battalion. 
In the latter part of the poem: "The 
Second World War was a coUabor / 
'iwccn the Nazis of England and 
Germ, / With money from the 
Slates, / And helped on by 
Hapsburg and Rome." He makes a 
very solid case. 

So the reason for WW2 would be 
to keep the Grey Men in the 

In the black, yes, prcsciscly. After 
the Depression they needed to get 
into the black. I don't know if I can 
speak as an historian, but as an 
anisi, searching for some son of 
explanation of the things that 
touched me personally, I would not 
be surprised if ihe existence of the 
so-called Grey Men was nol a 
ngmeni of the imagination. 

As far as the bottom line of the 
poem is, and again it's an intuitive 
conclusion, the suggestion is that 
the changes which arc happening in 
Eastern Europe are not haphazard, 
are not accidental, that it is the 
prelude of a reunited Europe, 
whether a World State is in the 
wings or not, we don't know, but 
that's what the suggestion Is. The 
other suggestion Is in the poem. Of 
course one must Ircat Ihc poem as 
an integrity within itself, I mean, 
you can make certain suggestions 
within a poem thai you can'i 
actually make outside of a poem. 
/ was wondering why you chose 
the poetic form. I thought il 
might be to obscure some of the 
references it made. 
To individuals and lliat. 

Oh. yes, lhal was one of the 

One of the Committee of 13 
mentioned to me that some 
higher powers were less than 
pleased with this poem. Have 
you been contacted by anybody? 
No, not since the poem came into 
Ihc picture. I was In touch with 
certain higher powers before 

publishing it, but they weren't the 
same higher powers that would he 
contacting me. Because 1 am 
making some suggestions ihai 
money for higher education may 
have been turned to use for non- 

Yes, if the NASA computer is 
connected with NATO, with Star 

Do you believe it is? 
I don'i know. I don't know. But I 
did talk to somebody who is an 
authority on computers, who was 
here ihc year ihat it was bought, and 
it was he who actually got my mind 
going, you know, a computer that 
big can only mean one thing: a 
connection with the military. I 
didn't know it at lhal lime, I only 
heard from one of the higher 
powers, in fact a member of the 
Governing Council in January. Il 
may have been public knowledge 
before then. He or she lold mc, 
"Nol only are you on the right 
track, but the computer came from 
NASA, and il was four years old, 
so it liad time to be programmed." 
So I put lhal information in from the 
member of the Governing Council. 
So the computer apparently slill 
functions as a military -- 
I don't know. Bui in terms of iJic 
mythos of the poem, il is taken to 
be one of the central nervous 
terminals of NATO. And this is not 
the only university, I've been told. 
There arc other universities 
throughout North America. 
In Canada? 

No, North America. I think it was 
the States, Canada wasn't 
menlioned. You sec, when people 
know that you're doing something 
like this, they give you bits and 
pieces of information. Now, 
pcrliaps there's a perfectly rational 
explanation. But again, it doesn't 
assuage the pain that I experienced 
as an individual in this University 
fighting a campaign for twenty 
years for one of the great neglected 
areas of civilization, to come up 
upon this Impenetrable wall in 
1986. I think somebody should iry 
to find out if it's been u.scd in terms 
of NATO or Star Wars. That's 
only one line of the poem: "...that 
Uic EYE of Nato / is the u of l: / 
Connell's computer and a Cyclops 
eye." It's a vay important line, and 
we have to difTcrcntiate, as I say, 
between what is the myiho.'; of the 
poem and what are the facts and 
actuality. Now, I'm treading a 
threshold here. I'm covering 
myself: I put the poem through a 
libel lawyer, in I could be sued 
by various panics in the poem. I'm 
dancing on thai threshold of 
"Well... there is this evidence." 
And then on the other threshold 
there is the mythos of my poem. 
Bui I would be very happy if 
journalists like yourself could 
penetrate and discover what is tlic 
actual case here, in terms of that 
Cray computer. Whalpaccntagcof 

academics are using il, and for 

I've heard thai the Cray is nol 

gelling an awful lot of academic 

u.\-e because of the costs involved 

in renting its time. 

Of course. Well, there you arc. 

Thai raises some interesting 


or course it raises interesting 
questions. Did they make a 
mistake? Or is it something else? 

Do you think that the University 
or whatever powers might be 
involved in this have something 
against Celtic Studies? 
Well, I've had nothing but 
tremendous cooperation from a 
sequence of university prosidcnus: 
Bissel, Evans, Ham. David 
Sirangway. Celiic Studies was 
pariicularily dangerous in '86 
because I had the power at the time 
- you know, all I had to do was lo 
call the Globe and Mail and I had 
my story in the paper. Wc built up 
an awful lot of people through the 
years, you know, rich people, 
influential people. Il was a 
movement with an awful lot of 
sympathy - an awful lot of 
Canadians had forgotten forgotten 
about being Irish, or were ashamed 
about being because of what 
was going on (in Ireland}. We had 
a good deal of support from tiie 
Orange Irish, I tliink it's a matter of 
ihe University nol being able to 
follow through on what was 
initialed earlier. Evans iniiiatcd Uic 
programs within colleges. The 
story is quite horrendous, because 
if you have the Minister giving U of 
T let's say $12 million, [of the nny 
millicr dollar Excellence Fundi, the 
price of ihe computer, they were 
perhaps afraid of mc because I had 
got $300,000 from Ireland for 
Celtic Studies here. And that was 
running out. Insland's a very poor 
country to be subsidizing the higher 
education of Ontario. And [the 
subsidy] was coming up for 
renewal. The story is so 
complicalcd I can't even begin lo go 
into it without the documents, and 
there are literally thousands of 
pages of documents. Kelly put in a 
million. I raised a million, Ireland 
put up $300,000. And then we 
come to U of T. They were 
suppcscd to put in theirs in '86, and 
they put in nothing. Now the 
program is continuing, ii is being 

At that point, the poel takes 
those events. Is rather crushed by 
them, but then a mythology forms 
in his mind. Now. is the substance 
of my thing mylhologizing or is il 
reality. Well. I would like to say 
that all of it founded on reality. 

fu^l of two parts 

The Armageddon Series Part It: Nato 
and Ihe Warsaw Pad Are One is on 
sale In bookstores now. The first pan of 
the Armageddon scries. A Symphony 
for Three, and O'Driscoll's 
autobiography Mea Culpa: Psychic 
Warfare in Our Times, are works in 

Beyond the Envelope 


Loren Davie 

Ice, jade, rcneciion pools 
almost pure and bcautifuJ pain 
A knife imbedded in my lorso 

TwisU, my insidcs reconfigure 
I half-smile: ihetnuhwill 

Shock them 
For ihcm, my disguise is flawless. 

Ode To Thee MIshKa 

Imagine Ihysclf 
on a wide open plain 
floating atop the 
deep blue sea. 

Prom his sultry lips, 
vast sky above 
caresses thee with 
his gentle breath. 

O peace... O peace. 

Listen carefully 
and to thy cars, 
a distant cry rings. 
Northward face thee 
curious of the shree 
and gaze at the 
enormous tailfin 
submerge below the waters. 

It approaches. 

Skin to skin, 

she dicles thy frame. 

A tender spun of mist. 

Solely she speala, 
cheek to cheek. 
Don't fret, 
'tis only f. 

Then the mighty lailfm 
vanishes beneath the waves. 

Wading In Shades Daniel Hill 

Blue tinted waves, 
coal burning sand, 
islands of people 
in groups and in strands. 

A social gathering 
ihis beach by the sea 
spotted in persons, 
people and me. 

Sun scorched and pale 

there's a father who wades 

his daughter in hand, playing in waves. 

Is held tight to his side 

removed from his gaze: 
"daddy is always wading in shades." 

Women are framed from 
the neck to the thighs 
mirrored on edge 
of chromc-plalcd eyes. 

And we play 
And we laugh, 
sun bathe and wade. 
Bum in cold water 
like ice in the rain. 

It's all like a dream with the volume turned down. 
Waves on the beach the only voices that sound. 



falling to the ground 

futility - seen now for what it is: my life 

my struggle 

paralytic acceptance sweqjs thni me: do my eyes 

or is the world going black? 


standing before the giant, I fed his power 

but refuse to bow to it 
headvances: I reueat, then rush past him, 

to that which I know he must be guarding 
his hand reaches out, drags me back 
I stumble, fall : only despetaiion saves me from 

the falling mountain 
I rise, and must again retreat 
half of me regards the conilia. flame and stars, 
song and sea, 

time's body is all that shields me from death, 
and it is far firom inTmite 
yet I dodge and dance, singin as i fight, and the 
song spills from my lips to the air. to be 
swept away far beyond the giant's reach 
falling to the pnmnd apin, 

but this time smiling: I go. but the song 


On PaeuJonyms 

It seems to have become 
fashionable to submit worii to the 
Herald under pen names. A few 
problems have arisen from this. 
Instead of using a niclaiame (Blitz, 
etc.) people arc using pen names uj 
hide their true identity. While this 
may seem trivial, it is very 
important to us as editors due lo the 
fact that we arc held responsible for 
the articles we print. If we cannot 
reach the authors for cither 
revisions, explanations, or 
congratulations, our job is made 
more difficult. 

Obviously 1 am in favour of 
people trashing the idcniiics 
moulded for ihcm. while in a 
vulnerable state of youthful naivcic, 
by well-meaning societal rarcc,<; (or 
for whatever reason ,';omconc 
changes her/his name) but as far as 
Herald policy, wc have lo know 
who wrote what. So, if you want 
to use a pen name, include 
your generally used name. If that 
happens lo be a pseudonym, all ihc 
better... I mean, shouldn't 
everyone name ihcmsclves? 

A NaiTow Crooked Flight 

Spiralling down 
to the deepest, 
darkest r^ions 
of consdousness, 
I fall 

Ashes to ashes 

dust to bouldm. 

No tribute to 

this pathetic hero 

who strove for the highest depths 

and attained, 


by taking ihe 
travelled road, 
aixl ix)w, 

while the 0%'crcasi sky 

hides the shining cold black sun, 

is buried. 


in the Jonei' playbox. 

Six Epics 


Do not leave me here 
in your sea of darVness 
ploying with Its 
scattered treasures 
and failing consent. 

Do you know 
1 cannot hear you 
when you speak 
I only need 

to see your voice 
because tlie bubbles 
all move upward 
and give me 
a sense of direction 
even if I have 

nowhere to go. 

Imrt Juurlink 


The stones will sing to me 
Ihelr voices are so dear 
they say to be immactilalc 
I close me eyrs and ears. 

I look only inward 
at sudden progiusions 
and hesitant reflections 
of the questions that I ask. 

Sometimes everything makes almost 
perfect serise: I con walk and I can talk 
and I can I'tal your perfect touch 
upon my wet>kened skin. 

And how could everything be evil 
how could tills be such a tin 
when deep Imldc you are within 
and I revel ui your silent quest for uniiy. 


(Courage and Faith 
sat down together once 
and spoke earnestly 
10 all the pieces of glass 
my hands had placed 
inside myself. 

They told me 

there is platx for love 

and everything men do 

that life is not 

a fading star 

that I contribute to. 

And that nl^ 
I could see purity 
and I could feel 
their strength inside 
But why i» what they bring 
a gin I must accept? 


Your nails 
are on 
my bedside 
at Ihcm 
and sense 
their longing 
for ny blood 
so Isaeam 
for you to 
put ihcm 
on again - 
your pain 
is not 


diffoence > 
andl A 

bear it 
so much I 

And I suppose 
we arc all alone 

for that final answer 
for the stranger 
at the door 
but our fears 
and hopes arc silaii 
behind the bcdrrom walls 
I scream: Please do not lca\-c me 
You say: Please aks mc not to go 
Bui fear holds its hand 
cr-vs bodi our mouths 
and once again ut are alone 
Tell me where does courage 1 
when it has no place lo (.o'! 

The Power of Mannerism 


Thoughts of a veil of hair 
the colour of intimacy 
animate daydreams of freedom and Spring 
- the colour of candle-splashed memories of 
quickly drawn breaths sm baihs 

Long, beautiful bouts of words 
and eyelashes 

and manneiisms that strike unaimcd 

then disappear beneath clocks and calendars 

and the ambivalent malignancy of appointment 

The fleeting childhood of aquainiancc 
invariably becomes a flower, 

from a slowly depleting garden, cut from the nursing stem 

It lies in stale, bcatiful and dry 

brittle and fragrant within the sleeping room 


Some Lines for Blintz Sean Gregory 

blintz: (blinis)n. a thin pancake rolled with a filling 
of cottage cheese, often topped with fruit; a dessert. 

Mr. Blintz, your spongy frame 

Is sustained by runny cheese. 

Cease trying to rasp out your fame; 

You try to instruct and please. 

But the satire of your column 

Is itself pan of the problem 

That you fail to foresee. 

Mr. B,, you put issues in ihe stove 

That just came from being froze. 

Then expect your reader to say, "Gee." 

From with folly will you ever be free? 

Angry llulc Blintz, you should be at least a bit grateful 
For the faculty at 11 of T; they keep things alive, not dead! 

Poor, poor Blintz; so many isms... 

What topping do you choose today? 


Or is it anarchy on the tray? 

Raspberry andbluebcny 

Are my personal favourites, 

Bui do ihey righteously carry 

All thai goes well with student's rights? 

Well, how's about some coffee 

To wash away your oh-so-Iow 

Wit ihai is at b(St dreary: 

It feeds nothing, save your ego. 

For your over-cooked words I am not grateful 

Mr. Blintz; they've long finished smouldering - Ihe/rc dead! 

Mr. Blintz sits musing In Ihe caSi 
Half-learning some obscure theory, 
But he has roilly itothing to say: 
It makes little Blintz weaiy - 
And the Herald will be in dismay! 
(You loo?) So! Just turn on ihe music, 
But slay away from thai dial 
If you like sounds elecuic, 
you'll be punished without a trial. 
Mr. Blintz, you've got no style. 
Your poorly propounded propositions 
Pile up beside your miscalculated 
Pancake wrap-around, now soaked in bile. 

Grateful are those who eat their courses of knowled^s letting a 
Dead calm follow full of meditation, not blind application. 

Am I punching 

loo low for our 

UtUe Blintz? Well, 

rm sorry if I've hun you some. 

Thou tasty dessert; but bt warned. 

There may be more to come - 

Just keep beating your old drum,... 

A Token ot My Appreciation Blitz 

There once was a young man named Scan 
Whose poison tipped pen babbled on 

If asked m explain 

He would sneer and would say 
"It's just Uvai I'm right and he's wrong," 

Breakfast With Daniel Lucretla 

Not Ihe ordinary 
chiidial of familiar friends, 
but the rustle of Ihe paper. 
ColTec, U2.orme7 

Sorry, your loss. 
Not the usual 

gossip of people passing by, 

but Uie Pnncc of the Pop-up toaster. 

Can't you sec? 


Light up a cigarette 
I cough, blow my nose 
The paper is very intctesiing. 
Don't you understand? 

Brcakfasl has come and gone 
and nothing has been said 
ilial is of any importance. 
When you pay, you don't lip, 
and 1 laugh, 

I'm laughing at you, with you, 
at the world, 
and wc leave. 

(Attempts arc futile with closed minds.) 

Outside, we say goodbye 
and as I walk away, I look back, 
(Don't look bade you'll only get hurl) 
and your flgurc getting lost in the aowd. 

Touched John Anderson 

how Ihe dark ctose intense of siiKerity 
the lifting leaning wondering mist 
does affect this sole heart, pressed, spilled 
realizes of awareness veined and rushed 
the almost last tear in the veil that 
darks the golding newly searching eyes 
from the gliuering world 

taken by a hand and shown past the snowy surround 

touched by the unsubUe of introduction 

moved and friend spin cling dive twist gaze 

this sense is opened sight is wide 

the world is ended or begun i'm in 

love with all of us 

and the riven driven fall in the tont wall. 

Still Life 

Daniel Hill 

The flowers have frozen lo the window, 
their petals leaning for sun. 

Tl^Ve become in bending a sculpture 
stifled in frost 

They've cracked the vase 
and the ice has leaked 
across the desk in mourning, 

though the stems were clipped long before. 

Jean Dodot discussing 
line bhagavad-gita as 

11 IS. 

yuklo koglln 

dodot: nothing matters so much 
that you really have to worry about 

yukio: exaclty 

d: no i mean worry about 
everything because nothing mailers. 
y: so its really just the mood I'm 

d; yes. 


d: oh fuck. 

y: what 

d; i feel shiily 

y: the why don't you join mt; in 
this weekend in a two day 
course "our lady of holy 
redemption brin^inf^ the rrninny- 
machine to eastern Eurnju; ' 
they don't let you no tf> the 
washroom all weekend, ami plan 
lo cut a liQL new single "We are 
the world — Big Macs to 
Bucharest. " I think it'll raise a 
lot of money for a worthy cause. 
[with extreme hope in his eyes] 
d: see, redneck, you stand back too 
far and you fall off the cliff, 
unfonunaicly you always live from 
the fall into the void also.... 
y: ....also sprach zarathuslra; 
like Wile E. Coyote alio? 
d: always. Even the best Foghom 
Leghorn cartoon can become 
meaningless when you realize that 
old widcrhen is searching in vain 
for a hubby and the dawg is 
pranking in vain and even Foghom 
is doodadaing (in vain)... that's 
what they were crying to lell all the 
kids when they started making 
those mindless roadrunner canoons 
after years of genius — "life is 
meaningless, you devise ingenious 
schemes to get dinner but you 
always fall off a cliff hungry AND 
you have to do it all over again." 

y: who do you think you are: 
Regg Hart?? Ruddy Coaster- 

d: you have to be able to laugh at 
everything, even your own death. 
Anaud had rocks in his pockets, he 
thought the audience was going to 

y: Arlaud,Arload!!! 
d: yes, those bits of reality he 
talked about, waited for, they come 
to the surface because they're 
mammals like us, you know. They 
breathe the same air we breathe. 
y: are you trying lo lell me 

d: it's the dolphin's knowing eye ai 
water level and the permanent smile 
just below. 

y: is that how Arlaud laughed 
even while pelting Regg Han 
with his stones? 

d: it almost wants to make you 

believe in tiie Conspiracy. 

y: the Crying Lot 49? 

d: no, it's more like the crying of 

Lotto 6/49, there is no formula, 

money won't set you free. 

y; ok, it's alia hoax then, but 

Where's your social conscience 

matt!? at least. 
d: i must have left it in my other 
soot [searching pockets) along 
with my wallet ... lo coin a 

y: why, you dirty liar. 

[conversation actually took place 
over the Labour Day weekend in 
the audience of the Jerry Lewis 
"Telethon", which is the 
relationship between the dolphin 
packs and tuna herds which 
swim under them as articulated 
in the French language, 

Forthright Speaking 

Rick Campbell 

More on the Toronto theatre 
scene from Theatre Offal's 
playwright! director Laura 

Is there room within the 
mandate of Theatre Offal for a 
production of a Shakespeare 
play? Theatre Columbus are now 
doing Twelfth Nighl, for 
instance. This seems a kind of 
departure for them. 
Laura Forih: Yes il would. U 
would have lo be approached in an 
cnlircly radical manner though. 
For the sake of being radical? 
It's radical to give an audience a 
new perspective on an old work. 
Grotowski's production of Dr. 
Faustus started with the last scene 
firsL Thenhcdidaicxiualmoniagc 
of all the other scenes. Skipping 
from back to front. The whole 
staging of the pUy was very weird. 
The audience were all seated at a 
dining room table. He knew that 
his audience knew the play very 
well but by staging it in this manner 
Orotowski brought about new ideas 
and new realizations for them. 
/( made them consider different 
aspects of the play they'd either 
missed or ^tossed over. 
Yes. Tliat IS my primary purpose in 
altering a classic text. We 
costumed (he actors in our 
production of the Restoration 
comedy. The Country Wife in 
what I call a "contemporary 
bathroom molir. The "ladies of 
quality" for instance, wore shower 
curtains rather than huge dresses. 
For their huge wigs we used toilet 
paper rolls that we had spray- 

painted. The mitTX>rs that they wore 
on their waists were toilet bnishcs. 
A lot of our prop and costume ideas 
came from the contemporary 
bathroom. This not only gave it an 
absurd flavour but also tied in 
thematically with the play itself. 
There's an artifice in the characte" 
Everyone is supposed to be clean 
and pure and beautiful, but in reality 
they live these sordid, petty, dirty 
lives. We wanted to manifest those 
qualities. Today, we're all 
obsessed with personal hygiene. If 
you don't shower every day or use 
toilet paper you're a leper of 
society. We wanted to lie our 
society's artifices with those of the 
society portrayed in the play. 
What's next for Theatre Offal? 
We've got a new show that I'm 
working on based on quantum 
mechanics. I'm writing it. It's 
purpose is to make the spectator re- 
evaluate reality. Is reality really 
cause and effect related? We can 
only perceive the world in the 
classical manner of... let's say 
Newtonian physics. But true reality 
is quantum reality. We can't 
visualize that, but it's the way the 
universe works. 
And the play? 

It's audience participatory and it's 
going to be a lot of fun. 'TheTB will 
be characters who have their stories 
to tell. I've realized that 
unfortunately that's the only way an 
audience can relate... 
What Is your favorite sort of 

I love Grotowski. Antonin Artaud. 
I've had the opportunity to see 
some of Bill KIschuk's productions 
at the U.C. Playhouse. He did a 
thing cailedShakespearelArtaud 
Madness. He'd perform King 

Lear, playing all of the characters 
using physical actions that don't 
necessarily relate to the text. He 
divorced text from movement and 
juxtaposed them. A lot of Artaud's 
ideas are based on Oriental theatre 
and dreams - theatre based on the 
unconscious rather than the 
conscious. Dreams arc very vivid 
but they don't always make sense. 
Nevertheless there arc incredible 
symbols and images in them, 
■file play I'm writing now — 
Quantum Cumquat - doesn't have 
a lot of dialogue, but there's a lot of 
movement. We'll be presenting a 
lot of different images on the stage. 
It will be up to the audience to link 
them all together. In other words, 
we'll be challenging each member 
of the audience to create their own 
"story". Different symbols mean 
different things to different people, 
especially in dreams. The play will 
have different messages for 
different people. They also get to 
participate in the action. It'll be 
fun. It's drawn from a show I did 
in Australia. I based that one on 
Sufi-Hindu reincarnation theory. 
The characters started out as 
vegetables then became animals, 
then people. They all uied to lead 
purer lives each time but if one 
made a mistake it was back to being 
a cumquat. So it becomes a 
competition between the characurs. 
Where are you doing this? 
At the Fringe Festival. I think that 
will be in early August. Hopefully 
we'll be held over like we were last 
year when we were chosen as one 
of the five "Fringe's Choice" 

What productions in Toronto 
really impressed you last year? 
Theatre Augusta's Indulgence. 
Once again a lot of people could sec 
that show and say, "That's not a 
play!", but there were some very 
striking images. And it didn't 
molly-coddle or manipulate its 
audience. Mump arul Smoot was 
another very good show - at 
Factory Theatre. It used clown 
techniques. I can't really recall 
everything I saw. 
Haw about the worst play? 
The worst... hmm... I guess The 
Phantom of the Opera. I didn't 
like Les Miserables the first time I 
saw it but the second time I sat 
much closer and actually saw that 
there was some theatre happening 
on the stage. 

Is il a lack of 'theatre tradition" 
thai makes theatre a poor cousin 

to movies and television in this 

We expect a realistic cause-and- 
effcct kind of theatre here. We 
expect on stage the kind of 
structures that we see on the 
conventional movie screen. We're 
afraid of trying anything different 
because we don't want to scare 
audiences away. 
Not to mention gran! money. 
In North America, we're always 
looking for tliat stamp of approval. 
We're not as comfortable in our 
craft as they are in Europe. 
England's Royal Court and even the 
Royal Shakespeare Company do 
things Stratford would be tcirificd 
to touch. They don't realize that if 
the production is good, the audience 
will come 

They feel Ihey have to validate 
themselves by putting on these 
stodgy productions rather than 
saying, "Yes. We are the 
Stratford Festival. We are the 
continent's pre-eminienl rep 
company. Now excuse us while 
we lake a few risks." 
It seems to me we've gone back 
to this love of melodrama, where 
grandiose senlimenlalily is 
paraded as honest emotion. And 
spectacle. We leave the theatre 
wiping our eyes saying, "Wow! 
That was great! That was great 
the way that trap door opened up 
and that giant radish popped up 
out of the floor and then il 
opened up and all these lights 
came out! Arui then when the 
radish died I cried and cried...' 
Do you think people are afraid of 
theatre that is off beat? Have 
our lives become so gloomy thai 
we want nothing but pure 
mindless entertainment? Or is it 
merely because they're afraid 
they'll see something Ihey don't 

I don't think anyone understood 
Les Mil. I mean that story is so 
complex that you have to read five 
dense pages of plot synopsis in the 
program to imdrastand it. And even 
then you're thinking, "What the 
hell? Who is that?" So It's not like 
Les Mil is simplistic. I think wc 
live in conservative times. 
Everybody's into uniformity. 
North Americans basically share the 
same goals. People are into being 
the same as each other. 
Has it always been that way? 
We tend to romanticise other 

periods like the sixties. 
In the sixties it was cool to be 
different. Now it's cool to be the 
same. I'm not saying one is better 
thaji-the other. People in the sixties 
were just as much victims of the 
status quo as now. However I do 
think that now is a more stifling 

Maybe thai precarious balance 
between creativity and the 
bottom line that existed in the 
sixties has lipped too much the 
other way. Now it seems lhal 
the real art is in the making of 
money. People lend lo admire 
Doruild Trump and Lee loccoca 
more than any arlist. We're 
more impressed by the size of a 
production's budget than we are 
by the quality of the production 
We're more impressed by how 
much money the Rolling Stones 
made than by whether or not 
Ihey put on a good show. Do you 
think people like Peter B.rook 
and Grotowski are working in a 

Grotowski has moved from being 
teacher to healer. He's into 
something called para-thcatrc. He 
has these week-end rcu^ts that arc 
almost survivalist, designed to 
bring about a breakthrough in your 
psyche - a transformalion of spirit. 
He used to try to accomplish this 
tiirough theatre. Now he's trying a 
more direct approach. 
Are you worried about finances 
for your company? 
Wc did God Is Dead... for 
nothing. Altcmativf theatre has 
always been theatre of the poor. 
Poor in money but not poor in spirit 
or ideas. The only real expense is 

Cicity and of course the space, 
can be a problem. 
You don't think theatre is dead 
then? Some people seem to 
think it is dead. 

Grotowski said. "Theatre is dead. 
Long live theatre." It's a natural 
process. Anything that dies is 
somehow reborn. If it's going to 
die, great Long live theatre. 
Are you going to see The 
Grateful Dead in Hamilton? 
I've never heard of them. Who arc 

Second of two parts. 

Jessica Lange Makes Music 

Karen Sumner 

In The Music Box, Jessica 
Lange co-stars with the Hungarian 
Philharmonic Orchestra in a 
beautifully filmed but occasionally 
weak sioiy of a woman who must 
defend her father against 
accusations of war crimes. Both 
Lange and the H.P.O. arc 
impressive, but Lange is especially 
notable for a very inielli-gent. un- 
Glenn Closian performance in the 
courtroom. She does not wcaj 
seam-splitting short skirts or 
mannish overly tailored outfits. 
Nor does she sjaeechiry or brow- 
beat the witnesses, which is now dc 
rigucr courtroom behaviour in 
films, especially when il is a 
woman who is the bully. Lange Is 
soft-spoken and acts mainly with 

her eyes, through which we can sec 
both her determination and her 
intellect without her having lo 
bristle around the courtroom in that 
steely I-am-so-much-in-conuol 
manner that we have so come to 
know jnd loathe. The film falters 
with ail the sentimental business 
between Lange's young son (the 
pcrenially cute Lukas Haas) and her 
father (Armin-Muehllcr Stahl), and 
there arc many moments when you 
wish the director (Costa-Gavras) 
woi'ld leave all the symbolism alone 
for It minute and get on with the 
story. But Jessica Lange looks grca 
in the wine-coloured surroundings, 
and the music, while bealing 
oppressively (almosl claustro- 
phobically) around her, jangles a 
score thai leaves the other actors in 
the dust. 

Art Gallery of Ontario 

Musee des beoux-orts de rOnlano 

Philip Glass 
Hobert Ashley 

John Cage 
Meredi'th Monk 

Peter Grecnnw^'s television series Four 
American Composers will l>c screened In the 
Jnckmon Hall at the Art G.TjIcry of Ontario on 
Marrh 22 and March 23. 1990 In conjunction 
wltli H retit>specU\'e of his work. 

Pour American Composers features each 
composer In an hour-long cjcamlnatlon of their 
music and working methods. Further 
Information can be otjtalncd by callinf: 977 
04H. ext. 260 Admission Is $5.00 per 

Screening times and dates Arc as toUov-s: 

Thui^a.v. March 23. 1990. 7-00 p.m.: 

Jobs C»t« [\dS3. 56 mm . colour! 
UereiUth Uonk I19S;;. M mln . colour) 

I=Vld«5-. Marxrh 23 1990. 7:00 p.m : 

Ptail|i Olasi I19S3. 56 mln . colour) 
Rot)«rt Ashley 119^^. 56 nun., colour) 

We liave a 

Kathj' Humphreys 

It started off as what could be 
classed as a nomial morining. 1 
went downstairs to the kitchen, had 
some breakfast, and read the 
newspaper. 1 then got up to check 
ihc mail; to check and sec whether 
something new and enciting had 
been delivered at my doorstep 
(although I must admit that such a 
miracle has yet to occur). 

Lo and behold, there was 
something after all. I carcfulty laid 
my friend's much-wanted leluir to 
the side and looked closely at ihc 
envelope of the bulky, yet colourful 
piece of jumk mail. Naturally, I 
was curious. I wondered; how 
stupid can this one be? how 
annoyed will I feel after reading it? 

And so, this being my "last 
chance", I daringly took the jam- 
covered knife and opened the 
envelope. Suddenly, 1 was 
bombarded with my name. 
You may have won... KATHY 
HUMPHREYS. It is urgent - 
name was everywhere; on stickers, 
on coupons, on 'prc-exlraction 
dale' winner's ccnificaics. I have 
never seen my name in lights, but at 
least 1 have seen it <hi coupons. 

The secrets of the universe 
were at my fingertips and it was 
now up to me to claim what I had 
oh so deservedly won. Here was 
the enduring proof that human 
bemgs ultimately do have free will. 

Wonder of wonders: I could 
now purchase an "inspiring watch", 
one which had a picture of Jesus 
holding a lamb and the names of all 
twelve apostles: one name per 
number. When somebody asked 
me for the time, I could proudly 
announce it was Andrew past John, 

or Bartholomew to Judas. And... 
if I would just send for this one 
small vial of Rcgina Royal Jelly, I 
could use what Margaret Thatcher 
uses (but would anyone really 
want to use what Margaret Thatcher 

I no longer need look out the 
window and second-guess what the 
weather is like. lnsu:ad, I have to 
glimpse at the colour of a 
Meteorological Madonna and I will 
know exactly what kind of day it is. 
Lastly, for tliat giant space on the 
kitchen wall, which cries out for a 
piaure... a lovely velvet painting of 
Elvis' Last Supper. 

As the tension mounted, so the 
type style corresponded. From 
regular type to regular with 
emphasis, to block capitals. 
Finally, emphasized block capitals 
with certain key words or phrases, 
such as "free", or "at no cost", or 
"definitely", or "first category ", 
printed in red. 

I was now feeling very 
annoyed. Whal's-hcr-namc's letter 
lay right beside me - I had been 
waiting for it daily for over three 
months -- and here I was reading 
Wayne Wride's testimonial. 
Determined to solve the plot, lo 
uncover the scheme, I quickly 
moved on to the "details of 

Naturally, there was nothing 
above the ordinary age 
requirements, descriptions of 
aforementioned prizes, standard 
'skill-testing' arithmetical 0|Ucstions 
and deadlines. Once again I had 
wasted my miniscule amount of 
spare lime, and consciously caused 
myself to be frusu-ated. 1 knew 
what would happen and yet I did it 
anyway. I grabbed my friend's 
leuer and read through it, I can 
barely remember anything she said. 

t< ^ % Ok 

3^ ^ ^ tv 

6> O V 



A recent laic-nigtit cafe 
conversation has left me somewhat 
troubled over the character of David 
Suzuki. A popular columnist and 
documentary personality, wc have 
all warmed up to this Canadian 
saviour. To many, David Suzuki is 
the face of the environment. To 
others, he wears a phoney ma*. 

So there I was defending 
David Su/uki at three in the 
morning, my head a little weary, 
my facis not exactly clear. All I 
could utter was, "he's a mediator 
for the environment". 

My opponent, a practicing 
environmentalist, a .speaker and 
debater for Greenpeace, refuelling 
on another coffee, was ready to 
take me on. My companion, 
nibbling quietly on her falafcl, was 
prepared lo say out of the 

Argument number one; David 
Suzuki is only in it for the money. 
The opinion of my opponent was 
that Suzuki, having discovered his 
very lucrative niche in life, is using 
tlie popularity of the environment as 
a tool for profit - not unlike Dave 
Nichols and Loblaws. Apparently 
David Suzuki has a huge condo and 
an enormous CD collection and 
charges seven grand a shot to speak 
ai any forum. If David Suzuki is so 
concerned about the inequity of 
wealth, why docs he charge so 
much to preach his concern? 
Apparently Suzuki is nothing more 
than an cntcnaincr on a subject for 
which he has found his glory, a 
market he has so cleverly cornered. 
Anyone else could speak on the 
topics he so much likes lo reiterate 
in his columns, in his television 
specials, at his podium. The 
problem is that David Suzuki got 
there first, and anyone, 
paticlarly those with more depth to 
tlicir doctrines, have lo yell from 
tlic sidelines. 

My; Much of this is _ 

u-uc. 1 haven't heard of the CD David Suzuki is grooming hinuTelf 
collection, but I agree that David for a political carreer. My friend 
Suzuki says the .same things over has finished her falafel and is 
and over again without providing panicking for the cheque. I'm 
any real insight or solutions lo the sleepy, confused, sadly shattered, 
problems he presents. However, at Apparently David Suzuki, 
least he is taking up precious alUiough he has assured tis that he' 
airwaves and newspaper space and wants nothing to do with politics, 
the problems arc becoming has been secretly gaining the 
engraved in people's minds. Here popularity of Canadians who 
it comes -"Ho is a mediator for the desperately see him as a savior, 
environment", Surely ("Don't call Then one day when wc arc not 
me Shirley," I was inicrnipted) looking, he'll Join the reigning 
others could do it better and dig party and begin his campaign, 
below the shallow surface where My response: If the worst 
Suzuki so cautiously ircds water, thing to happen to the world be 
but would others be able to capiurc David Suzuki as Prime Minister 

the market and the audience like 
good or David? Wc all know how 
radicals scare people away, 
especially if they arc too left wing 
or anti-establishment. David 
Suzuki has gained the respect of the 
business community, the very 
people which my opponent, given 
the chance, would like to Tie upon. 
I would like to fie upon them too, 
but I doubt I would be given a 
prime-time slot to do so. 

Argument number two; David 
Suzuki is not really saying anydiing 
at all and time for another coffee. 
Apparently David Suzuki keeps his 
nose clean by veering away from 
the real issues while continuing to 
profit from the environment. A 
t>pical Suzuki article may cover the 
following topics: Deforestation in 
the Amazon, the poverty of 
developing countries, inequity. 
World Bank lending. Global 
Wanning (optional). It's the same 
old basic lesson on politics and the 
environment. What first-year 
university student is not aware of 
this. Why should David Suzuki 
continue to profit from the 
reha.shing of his age-old thesis? 

My response: Not everyone is 
a university student. Not everyone 
is aware of these issues. Umm... 
"David Suzuki is a mediator for the 
environment". Okay, so he docs 
dwell on the same topics and 
perhaps diverts our attention from 
what IS really happening. However, 
knowedge must begin from the 
basics. If people arc really 
interested they may try to dig 
deeper than ihc "David Suzuki 
Variety Hour", but true, maybe 
iliey will not. Suzuki's words of 
wisdom inform but do more to 
entertain, I agree. Is our 
infomiation coming from a narrow 
source? Are wc being kept satisfied 
by a one-man show? Do wc need 
more fibre in our diet? 

Argument number three 

then the future sure as hell looks 
bri|hter than it docs now. Perhaps 
he IS not Ihc grass-roots radical wc 
would like him to be, and maybe he 
adheres to "safe" slander, and 
maybe he docs not tell us what we 
want 10 hear — "Down with 
economics! Up with 

cnvirorunenialism and sustainable 
development! Join me as I lead the 
revolt against capitalism.'" But this 
is highly improbable. We arc out- 
numbered by economic priority. 
What David Suzuki docs is his best 
to work with the system rather than 
against it, because the latter will gel 
you nowhere beyond the podiums 
of folk clubs and church halls and 
the pages oralicmativc magazines. 
I'm not saying that David Suzuki 
should be commended for what he 
does. He merely has molded 
himself into a secure position and 
uses his clout to address some 
important issues, however 
superficially he may do so. And I 
certainly am not disagreeing widi 
my opponent. In fact, our opinions 
are not very different at all. I too 
wish thai something more could be 
done and that more could be related 
to the pubic than just the basic 
facts. But wc cannot put all of our 
hopes into one person -- David 
Suzuki. Wc must do it ourselves - 
protest, lobby, vote, become 
involved. I volunteer for 
environment groups, and in my 
little way 1 help. I may never gain 
the public rating as our friend (or 
foe) David Suzuki, but then maybe 
someone else will, someone else 
with more revolutionary ideas, 
perhaps my opponent, who, 
incidentally, has been invited lo 
debate David Suzuki sometime this 
year. I wish him luck. 

As a final word I would like to 
ask, from an environmental 
standpoint, who would you prefer 
as Prime Minister, David Suzuki or 
Brian Mulroncy? 

My opponent: One's as bad as 
Ihc other. 

My reply: "(Thcque please." 

fluntie 'M' 
from the 

If you have eels in your 
hovcrcrafi, don't come crying to 

I've got a bigger fish to fry - 
actually a pig portion. So I pose 
the question: 

How do you know when to 
fiip a piece of bacon? When is that 
split second before which the bacon 
is not done and after which it is? 
You may very well say it is a matiCT 
of personal preference, bui 
regardless of where your taste lies 
on the bacon spectrum, there is a 
time when wc will unanimously 
line up and declare the bacon done, 
and so for the other erxl. 

My point is this: bacon is way 
100 small for all ihe earths 
inhabitants to live on. so dicy live 
on ihe earth instead. Bui this docs 
not justify treating the eanh like a 
SU-ip of pork. 

If you exceed your bacon s 
doneness factor you can throw it 
away. As ycl wc don't have a big 
enough trash can to put the world 
in, so turn the heat down. 

We are amateur chefs with ihe 
globe in a pan over excessive heal. 
If we don't relax on pollutants 
spicing the atmosphere, or putting 
sludgey veggies in our ocean soup, 
or pulling all ihc trees out of ihe 
ground wc arc going lo end up with 
an earth which is w-ay too far down 
the bacon spectrum for any one to 
stomach. So switch to leaner meat, 
and don't put the fai dowTi the iirjc. 
The pan is on fire — take a 


tilt CoaiiaulAq Mv€nfuc€$ of 


The Superpowers of our Superhero,, 

Ask Hyrtfo 

for environmental 


Dear Myrtle, 

I was horriUcd lo Icam lhai 
Sidney Smith cafeteria charges 
forty cents extra for coffee if you 
tjTing your own reusable raug. Is 
iWs insane or what? 
-- Jniiis student 

Dcarlnnis student, ' 

I was not aware of iliis, for I 
seldom venture into such a chaotic 
carctcria; however, I shall take your 
vour word for what you say and 
■ r- inej accordingly, 

I tinaginc that that an extra 
tiiartjc IS piiKcd on a personal mug 
because, generally, coffee mugs 
have the potential of holding more 
fluid ounces of coffee than do the 
small siyrofoam cups provided by 
most cafeterias, i suggest you 
continue to bring your own mug 
but mark off a line thai represents 
an equivalent volume to the 
standard styrofoam cup. Then they 
will have no jtutijQable reason to 
charge you extra. If Ibey continue 
to charge you then all I can sagxesl 

is that you immodiaiely discontinue 
your patronage of such an environ- 
mentally-adverse establishment. 

The Innii Pub. lor example, 
encourages the use of reusable 
mugs. Unfortunately, the Pub has 
run out of "Innis Cafe" mugs but 
still welcomes the use of your own 
mug from home, however large it 
may be. I does not cost fony cents 
extra for two, three or even five 
more ounces of coffee. They arc 
ripping you off, while 
demonstrating n disf ,1'iiing lack of 
concern for thf environment and the 
aware studcnus who give a hoot. 

Sometimes 1 wonder if the 
university doesn't aim to stifle the 
awareness of students, keeping 
their opinions muted in a muzzle of 
general texts. From the bookstore 
which charges thirty dollars for a 
fifty page paper-back, to the 
structured course that outlines what 
you can Icam and raemorize and 
spew back up for them during the 
final exim, the university 
cmstantly rot» you of money and 

individuality. Take it from mc, a 
lazy middle-aged gal who once 
attended university but promptly 
dropped out after her first library 
fine, in university you spend so 
much time studying, that you 
haven't any time or any space to 

really Icam. 

What docs this have to do widi 
Sidney Smith cafeteria? Nothing 
really, but the point is that here wc 
have the only full-hour university 
pub and look at it. A university 
population of fifty-lhou-.aid, muI 
on a regular non-cvcni y.--'. 
might find six or seven people in 
die Hangar playing video games 
after a night class. But look on die 
bright side: after reading week, the 
Hangar will be boasting a sparkling 
new rotating gem — a disco ball! 
Yes, die campus hotspol can afford 
a disco ball but it cannot afford to 
support the opinions and concerns 
of the students it services. Thank 
you for letting myself and the 
readcis know about this atrocity. 


mm ^ uA^^m 


1. Founders of Meul (Hint: staiU wilh > 
colour and ends wilh a bar salute. 

2. NIGEL ^of Tap fame. 

3. "Smell the ". 

4. "Would you like lo sec the on 

ihc c-nd of 8 Rope?" 

5. Lead guy from Ihe Purple. 

6. "Gimme some " (or) "You never 

give me your ". 

7. Australopithiccnc-like member of G 

8. "And for All" 

9. Deep Purple: "They all went out lo 

10. The assholes we have (o legally buy 
our conceit tickeu from. 

11. " Joe". 

12. "Taking oul my f Poking 

your Hay". 

13. Keep Holy the 

14. " Elhcl" 

15. " aint no bad place lo be" 

16. smith or space. 

17. Black Sabbath: "After " (a long 


18. Drummer credits: Snake; Sabbath; 
Purple; ELP. 

19. "Knockin' at your back " 

20. " as a dog" 

21. Mcullica's latest ballad. 

22. " of this world" 

23. Mr. Tyler gels down in one. 

38. You need this to enter the Gasworks 
or Rock & RoU HeU. 


1. "He's got Big " 

4. Pope John Jones. 

7. A long thin METAL spike used to 
toast slabs of mcaL 

8. "She's got the " 


13. Drivtng force behind Motley Crue. 

14. The man behind the mask. 

21. He who coruumei bats (so they say). 

24. Not Heaven nor Hell. 

25. "Sweet of mine" 


.get out of my 


27."ImTnigrants and _ 

way ^ 

28. Scorpions favorite words (just pick up 
any album). 

29. Iron Maiden's lale 60's T.V. series tie- 

30. Spinal 

3 1 . Tap. (talk about a freebee). 

32. "Womcn And Children And 



36. - 

37. • 

_ lommi 


. the Rich" (Molothcad) 
_ with your boots on". 
39. John Robert (Sabbath) 

See ANSWERS, back page 


Inula College wtll pay MOO for 
the Iwat TUual rendering at the 
College. The lendering la to be 
uaed for a print for the Innia 
College Recognition Award 
winnera (ewerdcd to graduating 
•tudent* on the Iwala of acedemlo 
•chleremcnt and contribution to 
College Uf^) 

Hie Admleelona, Awarde k 
Connaelilng Committee will 
conaidet mil aabmlaalona. Work 
moat aultalile for a limited edltton 
print vill be gWen highaat 

Dallrer aubmlaelone to: aeiah 
White. Moderator. Admlaalei^.. 
Awarda «r Catm^nin^ ^.^^..^^Itr,, 
(o/oRoom 13I)nol>tarthaaJUia» 
March la. lano. 

IN Nils 

& C'Oirif lEIE IHOiUSIE 

Yhurs. Aiarch 12 & Wed. Aiarch 2S 






r^IDii'p.^SQ]^\' \VV^ 7:30P.M. 

I iOt *^r'HP^XXOM.^^iY^' 

ECr^ p^y^^^^ AVE. AT ST. i 



Held under special occasions permit 



ANSWERS: Odin A Warren's 
Mtlal Crossword. 

Acron: I Hluc Otnr 2 Tufnel J 
Glove 4 Pope 5 GiU&n 6. mooey 7 
Sliih t. luitici 9. Moaunu 10 C?l 
II Iky 11 Piidvlort 13 StbtnLh U 
CcVi 15. lleU 16. Aero 17 (otrvet It 
Coiy (?o»tll) l« doot M Sic* J I 
One 21 Lori U. cfcvuot }l LD 
Don: 1. Bklli • Tul. 7. ipii s. 
ltd ll.lliiOi I) ICS 14 Ce<^ 21. 
Ou) 24. purtalocr U. OullI 26. tM 
no 27, fi||OU 2*. Lov-c Yew 29. 
pritooer Tip 31. Spiiul 32 

CcwMxii 31 Tony 34. Dan 35. Sink 
J» Em 37 Ow 39 OrtKomt.